The Royal Standard, Wooburn Moor - 17th September 2008

Run Report by Brett

Jules crafted a most excellent run last night enjoyed by all of the half
dozen participants. Just 4 miles of flat terrain from and to the Royal
Standard that took us across fields and through copse and lush common
land returning in a staggering 41 minutes (PB for me!) At the front was
the course planner along with JB having just returned from SA (again).
In the middle were Pete, Kate & Duds and at the back was me delayed by
having to run and take notes at the same time.
We passed through a Duck Farm (I will come onto food later)and
unfortunately not through, but to the side, of a quaint Brakspears pub,
The Blackwood Arms. This looks like a perfect venue for next year in the
perhaps unlikely event of having an influx of new members from the
Slough area.
The Royal Standard was heaven, an outside smoking area that would almost
be worth getting lung cancer for, whilst inside stood ten proud real ale
pumps of differing brews. Sadly my intended chauffeurs, Richard/David
failed to make the run so I restricted my intake to pints of Bargee,
Crested Newt and Broadside. Jules happily entered into a tad of beer
tasting, his palate seeming to particularly appreciate the Stout like
Crested Newt.
Further discussion took place on the choice of venue for next week
thankfully interupted with comments on breast feeding, Lauras
graduation, The Royal Cape golf course, cycling 2 hours to Twickenham,
selling mobile homes (it's a real option I think) and The Daily Mail
reporting RGS rugby. It shouldn't take too long to work out who were the
respective contributors.
Three bowls of chips were taken followed by a formidable peanut and
tabasco chaser for Duds and I, whilst the more gentil amongst us
restricted themselves to plain Cashews.
So next week and after much debate, this appears to be the choice for a
river run, food and drink:
A) The Spade Oak, Colmoorholm Lane,Bourne End. Traditional Bistro type
food.
B) The Bounty followed by a thai meal at The Bankok Lounge in The Parade
Bourne End
C) The Prince of Wales Marlow. Thai pub meal.
Please let me know if you will be attending for a 6.30 start and what
your preference is by close of business on Friday so that I can get it
booked. Apologies if I have omitted someones favourite hostelry. If you
feel that strongly please email me with your suggestion and I will put
it to the vote
See you all next week.
Brett

Bull & Butcher, Turville - 10th September 2008

(Yet Another) Run Report by Kate

With the evenings drawing in and our thoughts turning to Winter and Christmas, a much depleted group of runners met in the car park of the Bull & Butcher. Those running members would were due to go Gulan the next day obviously saving their strength for the drinking that they will be doing and not willing to risk a fall that could damage their right arm ! I presume they all drink with their right arm or do they use that for something else?
There had been much debate earlier and hints to Jules about the length of the run, but the weather and the time of year fortunately dictated a relatively short run and not the ‘roller coaster’ as feared. From what I can remember it was a fairly uneventful run, couple of hills, nasty flinty path two thirds of the way through. Poor Susie was not able to join us as she was suffering from a bad back and went for a brisk walk instead. In semi darkness we all arrived safely back at the pub.
The pub itself seemed to have gone through slight refurbishment, unfortunately for the rest of the clientele we sat in the lounge bar, far too good really for us, with very little ventilation which was not good everyone else in the bar. Many thanks to Duds for the drink to celebrate Tilly’s birth, congratulations to both Aude and Duds. From what I can remember we were very noisy and managed to clear the bar quite quickly of other patrons. Three bowls of chips arrived and were gratefully received, it may be my imagination but are we drinking more ?? Brett took quite a lot of stick about the current state of the housing market, something he bore very well considering the situation. Susie wants to go the Whitehart in Desborough, not sure whether to watch or to take instruction? Jerome joined us as well, he wasn’t so keen on going to the Whitehart, bearing in mind that most of the patrons he has probably sacked at some stage.
Next week we are at the Royal Standard, Wooburn Common, nr Odds Farm, for all those with small children and all those with children not so small but still have good memories. Those with neither of these tough !! I think this will be a 6.30pm start and following week will be the last one.
Following a brief discussion it was decided that we would, for this year, depart from the norm, and not have a curry to mark the last run of the season but instead choose a pub who serves good food and acceptable wine and bitter. The Royal Oak, Bovingdon Green has been mentioned, if not there is the Bull & Butcher which had a interesting room and there is always the Grouse & Ale in Lane End. I’ll do some investigation and let you know, if however you have any other ideas of places please let me know.
See you all next week, remember due the time of year we can only do short runs which might perhaps inspire some to put in an appearance (David, Heather, Dales?)
Kate

Royal Oak, Bovingdon Green - 3rd September 2008

Run Report by Jerome

We ran from the royal oak at bovingdon green. Turn out was good. We set off and as I separated from the group due to ex-smokers collapsed lung disease I have no idea what it was like or where you went but then again jules probably didn’t either. I went and got my wife’s bike.
The beer was good as were the crisps and olives. Duds made us laugh as usual and I sat next to yummy Susie.
Bull and Butcher at Turville at 6.45 although today it was almost dark by 7. Fantastic. Up the hill to the windmill and down again into the pub.
Jerome

The Wheel, Naphill - 27 August 2008

Run Report by Amanda

A new pub had been selected for our run last Wednesday. Of the usual gang ,the following turned up: Kate,John, Duds,Pete,Presso,Jules and me. Dales also strolled in to accompany Heather on a shortened route. The route had been complied by John and at first we ran along the edge of Naphill Common,came out at Clappins Lane and Presso, Brett and Pete left us at the first junction in the woods. We then ran on footpaths towards Speen and North Dean. Quite a few hills but no stingers or fallers so I coped (having recently done some high altitude training in the Pyrenees) and in fact did not complain or swear once - a first. Along the route Duds showed us the location near Speen of a previous conquest many years ago and he assured Kate and I that it was probably over in a matter of seconds - mmm. It was a warm, close evening so we did cut a few corners off John's original route. We ended up in Stocking Lane where we met up with Dales and Heather.
The run was 4.6 miles and 54 minutes - sorry I cannot provide any other climb/calories burned/anorak information because I did not set my tic tac machine to record that information. A really nice run route with varied terrain and quite a lot of hills but no absolute killers. The pub should be added to our list of acceptable running venues.
At the pub the conversation was very diverse and covered:
GB teams success at Beijing - Pete noted that the cycling team had won more golds than I had predicted the whole GB team would win:
private parts piercings being known as a Prince Albert (according to Duds) - for the life of me I cannot recall how we got on to this subject so I cannot elaborate.
those with birthdays in January - Pete,Jules, Brett, Duds, Presso which obviously confirms the fact that the vast majority of supreme athletes are born in winter and are old in their school years. More importantly this also means that they avoid ever buying a round of drinks on a Wednesday to celebrate their birthdays.
On the above subject, Kate very kindly bought us all drinks as it was her birthday a few days before - thanks Kate.
It is starting to get quite dark by 8pm so I suggest that we meet at the Royal Oak, Bovingdon Green (I know we did our first run from there but we can do a different route) and depart at 6.45pm.
see you there
Amanda

Fox and Hounds, Christmas Common - 20th August 2008

Run Report by Kate

Dear all
I’m taking the easy option and following on from Dud’s email of last week for this weeks report.
With numbers severely down on last week, and raining threatening, myself, Duds, John and David set off from the Fox & Hound. Prior to setting off we were all informed by David that he would have to leave by 8.20pm or he would not get any food and he wanted a pint as well before leaving. (Good to hear that Diana has a firm hand, no doubt it’s needed!!) With instructions issued we set off down the hill towards Watlington, no map, on to the Ridgeway, fairly sure we knew the route and certain of a short cut for David is needed. As you can imagine the runners were well spread out with John in the lead, David bringing up the rear and Duds and I somewhere in the middle engaging in polite conversation. Upon reaching David’s much requested short cut, we all decided to keep him company, not that we achieved this, the home straight involving a particularly nasty hill up to Christmas Common. At one point Duds was walking as fast as I was running, something to do with his stride? John obviously reached the top first, did 20 press-ups and proceeded run back down, (too busy breathing to be impressed!) Once at the top Duds and I had a welcome break whilst we waited for David and discussed how much weight we needed to loose, especially John!
On arriving back at the pub, (at different times of course), we were informed by a delighted David that we had achieved his goal and he would now join us for a pint, in fact he was now a head of schedule and was able to leave at 8.10pm. Conversation in the pub centred round the Olympics and what medals the day’s events had brought. David told a disturbing story about identity theft that had recently happened to him, (be on the look out of David Abbot look alikes!) Steve Sutton later joined us as he had the kitty, where upon the discussion changed and a debate ensued as to who was ‘nicer’ Gaby Logan and Kirsty Gallagher? The latter winning it for Steve! Duds mentioned the Secret Millionaire programme he likes, ways to entice a millionaire on a Wednesday run were mentioned, a few thousand for running gear or the Bartlett emergency fund surely wouldn’t be missed?
We all left the pub promptly at 9pm as the music was about to start and we were sitting at the table where a very large man and his double base was about to play! Not sure he was any good we didn’t hang around to find out.
Next week’s run is causing some concern, I’m going to suggest the Three Feathers nr Cliveden and then a 40min run around the grounds, know the route as I do it with my running club. However, happy to consider other suggestions, as this may be considered too far out?? Response required.
See you all next week.
Kate

The Chequers at Wheeler End - Wed 13th August 2008

Run Report by Duds

A hardy bunch of runners met in squalid conditions at the above mentioned venue.
With the Peking (that one's for Kate) Olympics in full swing at the moment it would be fitting to present a Gold medal to the pub owners (Larry and Barry - sorry but I can't remember their names) for the free chilli con carne [it was the landlord's birthday], a Silver medal to the weather gods {every cloud has a ...... lining} and a Bronze medal to Jules for his map reading (not up to his usual standards last night I might add). More about all that later...
For those "in the know", the route was the usual one with the high point being the free view of the Wycombe Wanderers v Birmingham City game [or at least the warm up] and hearing the quiet rendition of "we love you Wycombe we do" by the hardy 300 or so loyal supporters packed into the top of the stands to avoid the horizontal rain [WW lost 0-4 by the way]. It was probably also the muddiest run that we have been on in a long while and the amount of stinging nettles / thorns and running off in the wrong direction at one point being the low points (I can still feel the tingling on my shins even as I type today) for the 5 "fitties (?)" at least [Selwyn, David and Jerome having taken an easier route which apparently avoided anything remotely uncomfortable; apart from the actual running that is....].
After an hour and twenty minutes (and hour and five for the fatties apparently] we all met in the bar for the usual enjoyable part of the evening. The thing I particularly remember from the run was the amusing semi-hump that Mrs Hucks had because of all the sh*te we were constantly wading / slipping through. Poor Jules naturally copped most of the blame for this and the rest of the "fitties" all backed off from criticising Jules in any way knowing full well that he was going to get it in the neck later anyway from his better half. I also distinctly remember sticking my nose in on the home leg and strongly advising Amanda to withdraw all conjugal rights on their holiday for at least.....a day or so. It will be interesting to hear how long this sexual famine lasted {we look forward to full report when you return from the Pyrenees please Jules and Amanda}....
Anyway, the banter in the pub ranged from talk of windsurfing to cycling (which position is better for hill climbing - standing up on the pedals or sitting down and pumping the legs like a madman/woman) to how the Chilli con carne tasted a bit like Spaghetti Bolognese gone wrong [a bit more spice landlady next time please otherwise the dish would just be called "a teaspoonful of rice, kidney beans and grated cheese con carne" wouldn't it !?] to how robotic and scary all the Chinese divers/gymnasts/etc. are to Jerome's weird/naughty dreams induced by those please-stop-me-smoking arm patches and how they should really invent a please-stop-me-eating arm patch to put on the other arm to counteract the inevitable weight gain caused by giving up smoking [Jerome reckons he could well be 20 stone by the time he next visits The Chequers] to the fairly brutal ways by which one can stop ones kids sucking their thumb to the need for a new method to stop ones kids biting their nails [by the way, Juliette wore a pair of silk Disney-character elbow length gold gloves in bed last night....did the trick apparently].
There was some debate as to where we should run from next week (20th) but after a long discussion we decided to run from the Fox and Hounds at Christmas Common as we haven't done that one for a while.
See as many of you as possible there for 7pm.
Duds.

The Ship, Cadmore End - 6th August 2008

Run Report by Steve S

Having somehow avoided run report duties so far this summer, I felt duty bound to volunteer to be this week’s scribe. With absence due to holidays etc. still very evident, a marginally larger group than last week gathered at the Ship for this weeks trek. Having taken the register, Jules, Amanda, Chris, Susie, Pete, Steve T, David and myself were all marked as present and just about ready for the off, when a rather flushed, half naked (well.. topless!) cyclist came racing towards us. JB had seemingly got his eta from Kingshill totally wrong and almost missed the start. However, after hurriedly donning a top and eventually finding a secure spot (??!!) for his bike, we set off.

A very pleasant (all downhill) start through rolling Bucks countryside had me thinking that at some point a ‘gentle’ climb was soon to be upon us. Having been lulled into a bit of a comfort zone, I think I had completely lost my bearings as we dropped down in to Turville when a sharp right turn presented us with the climbing wall that leads up to the Windmill. With several members of the group opting to run this, I went for the ‘home question’, deciding that a bit of oxygen debt due to walking was better than a cardiac arrest and total body collapse from trying to run.

Once gathered / recovered at the top, a fairly rapid descent down the other side presented us with yet another climb. What looked to be a more gentle slope was, to those with previous knowledge, possibly more of a psychological challenge than the first hill. A rather bemused couple out for an evening stroll, or alternative summer evening outdoor pursuit (?), were overtaken by the fitties, and then kindly held the gate open for the not so fit, who desperately tried to give the impression that the hill had presented very little difficulty. But once through the gate, an even steeper section of foot path demonstrated our true fitness levels and normal service of walking (for me anyway) was resumed.

After a flat final section, we returned to the pub after having completed just under 4 miles in approx 50 mins. Having opted for a sensible shorter route, Heather was already waiting for us. As we turned the car park into our usual changing room, I was aware of some shenanigans going on with the locals. Firstly it seemed that our ‘parallel’ parking had upset some and after moving the cars accordingly, I hope that the one extra space created help restore harmony. John, meanwhile was in negotiations with a ‘local’ over the release of his bike, which this individual had taken the liberty of padlocking to a gas canister !! The pub was fairly busy for a Wednesday, with local fayre seemingly very popular. Service was……….slow. In what was quickly turning in to a sauna, we retired to the covered area of the patio for drinks and nibbles as apparently the garden was out of bounds due to flooding ? Just for future reference the pub does not sell lager and I am reliably informed that the White wine spritzers have a certain ‘mouldy’ quality, also the sundried tomatoes in the olives have a ‘fizzy’ taste consistent with having a sell by date of 2006 !

Usual topical conversation pieces entertained us all. How to fool the Olympic drug testers by injecting someone else’s urine into one’s bladder prior to the test, and how there was a roaring trade in scrap metal leading to cannibalisation of road signs and burglary where copper piping is the primary target. The sound of rain on the canopy roof prompted fond memories of camping trips where the thought of a 400m trip to the ablutions block in the middle of the night gave rise to the dilemma of…. ‘I really need to get up before daylight so I won’t be seen nipping round behind the nearby hedge’ !

Next weeks jaunt will be from the Chequers in Wheeler End at 7pm. Would anyone with local knowledge be able to plan a route please ?

The Squirrel, Penn Street - 30th July 2008

Run Report by Pete

Six, credit-crunched, non-holidaying, serious runners turned out on Wednesday last for the "repeat" Squirrel run from the beautiful setting on Penn Street green. If there had been a 20 over cricket match on then we would have had it all. On a glorious summer’s evening when you wonder why you ever thoug ht of emigrating (that is until the holidaying chavs on the pub lawn opened their traps!) Susie, Amanda, Jules, Rodders, John and I met for a stroll through Penn Wood and Common Wood (presumably named after some of the other visitors to the area).

Amanda was struggling a little with a small hamstring injury, so as gallant as ever, I hung back to ensure she was OK (I was not slow!!) as Jules was far too busy with his map reading to worry about his wife’s fitness.
They say that in life, one should always "stop to smell the flowers" and so after the first mile we did. Unfortunately these particular flowers had been laid "in memoriam" after a tragic accident in the woods and so with words of condolence on we ran.

The injured/slow/female contingent took a slightly shorter run home (but only after the two mile gradual descent has been followed by a shorter steeper ascent). Rodders kindly sent us down a narrow, steep, nettle-infested path which then meant we had to run back up another hill, during which time Susie thought it would be a great idea to try to have a conversation with me about my career. Given I cannot run and wheeze, I kicked on and left Susie and Amanda for dead (a bit like Paula R did in 2004 in Athens). In the spirit of true gallantry I then let them past so they could have the glory of arriving back at the Squirrel first. Apparently we ran 4.03 miles. It felt longer.

The big 4 (can anybody break into that group in 2008/9?) arrived a few minutes later having taken a much easier (but slightly longer) route back to the pub, where we were met by Heather who arrived racing (on her bike) into the car park wearing the Maillot Jaune (or at least a bit of yellow in her shirt – I think). She looked fit. It must be all the running she keeps missing.

After a quick beer, 17 packets of nibbles and a few insect bites outside, we retired inside to debate a) the economy – 2 minutes, b) drinking among "the youth of today" – 15 minutes and c) the GB Olympic gold medal count – 20 minutes.

It was quickly determined that a ) the economy is f….d, b) we need differential drink pricing and the options are either beer is reduced and alcopops are put up or we charge by age range ("Ah, pint for you sir, certainly and as you are 52 that is £1.25 and an alcopop for you young man, well as you’re 18 (ho, ho) that’s £8.75"). I’ve rang the "man who knows" (Jeremy Clarkson not Gordon Brown) and apparently it will be in the next budget statement!

The sweep for c) was 7 Heather, 8 Amanda, 9 John, 10 Susie, 11 Jules, 13 Pete and 14 Rodders. Oh how little faith we have in our cyclists, sailors and boxers!

Next week we thought of going to the Squirrel at Penn Street, but apparently that has already been done (John, bloody listen next time) and so we went for second best. The Ship, Cadmore End, 7pm. Possible the roller coaster – the dark night!

Brett and Sarah's - 23rd July 2008

Run Report by John

Brett and Sarah's decision to postpone their barby from earlier in the month bore fruit as the sun shone and the air temperature reached something that might reasonably be called 'summer'.

Apart from the temperature, nothing else really changed. There was the usual delay at the start - no not from the Roddick / Huxtable circus nor Fred leaving the house late. This was the very popular local builder from Oakwood who had endeared themselves very early on to Brett and Sarah by damaging their wall during week one of the development progressing opposite. Not surprisingly Brett was not in the mood to assist with his broken down white van but everyone else was so Brett left us to get on with it. With enthusiasm that could only be described as maniacal, we sprinted up the road with the intention of giving the van a push. Once there a full service inspection was carried out by Roddick, Huxtable, Taylor with a bemused builder looking on . The conclusion after much discussion and with full Minutes taken was that the van was f#####d. A few sighs of relief were heard amongst the assembled mechanical ignoramusses and with guilt building by the second, the party just about managed to drag themselves away for the main purpose of the evening.

With Sarah leading the way, we embarked upon a very pleasant jaunt through Coney Copse, up onto Harvest Moor and Hillgrove Wood to the outer edges of Cookham Rise and down through Winter Hill golf course where the party split and made their respective ways home either via Cock Marsh or Patches. (Yes I know the area well).

Brett and Sarah's water bill ballooned through the roof as the girls decided to shower and change whilst the 'sweaties' decided to drink beer and annoy Brett with questions about the forthcoming new property over the road. Apparently demolition had started but that did not put off the Roddick / Huxtable clan from parking within demolition distance of the main property. Jules looked suitably put out when some polish lady demanded that he move the car otherwise it would be locked in. Bloody foreigners.

Welcome additons at this stage were Presso and Diana. Presso was boasting that he had been working that day (its ok for some). He also managed to confirm his position as number one phyromaniac with a bonfire that had nearly destroyed adjacent commercial installations - all described without a hint of concern. He was obviously entirely confident about Rodders' accidental damage insurance. Diana was doing her best to look happy at the prospect of a weekend away with David at a local B & B in Bournemouth. David was struggling to recall all the details but no doubt he will reveal all next - that's if Diana hasn't dumped him.

Superb ribs, kebabs, burgers, sausages were supremely cooked by Brett and guzzled down by the assembled gut buckets alongside salads, spaghetti (sorry don't know the technical name), potato salad and dressings. I did consider a second helping bearing in mind Jerome wasn't there. Fat chance - the naughty bench and Susie had scoffed the lot (proof of how delicious it was). PS. Naughty bench was Steve and Presso with Kate stuck in the middle really stirring it up. Yes she was drinking which probably didn't help. Oh yes and then came the puddings served elegantly by Amanda to both tables - probably so she could ensure her favourite didn't get eaten and the portions were rationed accordingly. Lime cheesecake and brownies with lovely thick clotted cream were enjoyed washed down with Rebellion beer and a very nice red. Sorry didn't try the white.

All that remained at the end of the evening (apart from waiting for Rodders to finish his brownie and clotted cream) was to say an enormous thank you to Sarah and Brett for hosting and supplying all the food and most importantly feeding my kids. You did us proud and hugely appreciated. I hope that you managed to get lots of volunteers for clearing up..................yeah when hell freezes over maybe.

Next week I have decided rather inevitably on The Squirrel in Penn Street.

See you all there.
John

Grouse & Ale, Lane End - 16th July 2008

Run Report by Richard

A very warm and muggy evening in Lane End started out with runners Jules and Amanda, Chris and Susie, Steve and Steve, Selwyn, David, Brett and myself.

Jules took us up through ASBO central, as we passed the playground I was in last place and felt exposed to attack from the snipers on the swings and the potential ambush from the hedges. Hastily I caught up with David and Selwyn to provide the attackers a greater choice.

The run was excellent with only one moment of deliberation over the correct route, this took us into the middle of a corn field where we found a sign post doing an impression of a bus stop. I’m sure pictures were taken. Susie fell over on route but was up and running in seconds without complaint and Amanda started to questions her husband’s accuracy over how far we were from home, even asking to view the map! Mutiny in the ranks! We split off into two groups for the final leg but all arrived back within 10/15 minutes of each other, I was sweating like an Israeli bus driver.

Drinks consumed included Broadside, San Miguel, Kronie, G & T, Fosters and White Wine. Food has progressed since I last ran, we were served posh chips the size of mars bars, stacked in a way that made you want to play jenga not eat them. This raised the question as to whether they were cut from one potato or reconstituted from mash? Were they even triple fried? Well they were certainly good with salt and ketchup and we rationed them out 1.5 each. Susie described her days of childhood, having breakfast in the kitchen dressed for school but minus knickers while mum dried them on the boiler. (I hope I’ve got this correct) Anyway Susie joked that it was always a worry that she’d leave for school commando! Jules creatively added that having the milkman walk in while the girls were having breakfast and strategically placing bottles of milk on the floor would have been interesting. (Is this correct? Wednesday seems a long time ago) Jules then went on to the random content of his dreams……………………….. In future I think we should stick to crisps and nuts.

Brett very kindly said that next week he and Sarah would host a BBQ (weather permitting), I’m sure he’ll provide info on what to bring etc.

The Gate, Bryants Bottom, 9th July

Sorry for the latesness of this report, it's taken me this long to work out how to post on the blog, but I have managed it all on my own with no help from our blog master!


Undeterred by the extreme weather conditions a fine turnout by clearly the heartiest and most disciplined members of our running crew…..Kate, Jerome, David, Selwyn, Amanda, Jules, Duds, Steve, John, Chris and I. We met in the Gate Car park, you could tell the serious runners were out in force by the now familiar rectangular bulge at their wrist.(Hidden from view under waterproof jackets) Duds and I had brief discussion on whether we could tape a tic-tac box to our wrist to give the impression we were also serious runners but in the end we decided the rattling of tic-tacs would give the game away.
As has become customary we set off up a steep hill to really get our hearts pumping. I don’t remember much more about the run apart from rain and more rain, endless puddles and very wet feet. We did all stick together for the complete route but I think the old “ it’s really not much further this way……..” is wearing a bit thin!

As I don’t have one of those bulges at my wrist I can’t give you the run stats but I’m sure it was a least twenty two tic-tacs.

We received a warm welcome at the gate, which has been smartened up and apart from the canaries is really quite an acceptable venue. The girls missed most of the initial conversation as they decided that the car park was really to wet to get changed in and they would have to resort to changing in the ladies loo. …it’s so much easier to do your lippy with a proper mirror instead of squatting by the car and using the wing mirror!

Kate kindly lent her towel to Duds and then discovered he’s used it to dry his ‘ nads. (Duds even gave a lively demo of how he dried his ‘ nads….mmmm lovely!!) I expect that’s one for the boil wash, Kate.

Luckily the conversation moved to slightly higher ground, when Amanda commented on David’s smart grey ensemble and there followed a debate as to whether it was indeed a tank top with t-shirt attached or if it fact they were separate items. David soon clarified the matter, it was actually a twin set from Polo.

The usual banter followed….

Next weeks run from the Grouse and Ale, Lane End.

Susie

The Fox at Ibstone, 2nd July 2008

Run Report by Amanda

I have been tasked with doing this week’s run report. I guess it is my turn and Steve, please note that it has been completed and posted prior to the imposed deadline so hopefully I will not incur any penalties.

The following showed up: Duds, Kate, Jerome, Selwyn, Brett, Spider, Pete, David, Jules, Chris, Steve and me. Jules and Chris ran there and just arrived before we all set off. I had drunk rather too much wine at lunchtime and had decided in advance that I was going to do a short run at a slow pace .Brett did then have a very sensible idea that from now on one person had to come along to the run having got bladdered at lunchtime - great idea Brett (not I can tell you). Luckily for me all agreed that it as to be a short 40 minute run as I knew that I would not be able to last any longer without passing out.

Just after setting off Chris disappeared into the bushes and I cannot repeat what Jerome referred to it as because Kate might never speak to me again. Steve marked arrows at every junction for Chris so he could follow our tracks. Chris did catch us up but he had taken a different route and failed to see the big arrows marked on the gravel. For the first 20 minutes most of the run was downhill so I knew what we would have to face to get back to the pub - a big long hill and it was just that. However I made it up the hill in one (albeit very slow) go - thanks to my pacemaker Jerome.

Jules has just read this report and mentioned that I have not said much about the route – the reason for that is that I have no idea where we ran although he has told me that we ran across Ibstone common, downhill through the woods to near Turville, turned right and then back up the hill and that there were some great views.

We made it back to the pub in 42 minutes - much to the disgust of Jules and Steve who reported that we had only run about 3.25 miles. It was certainly the shortest run of the season so far. The Fox has recently been refurbished and we sat outside on the newly decked patio in the sun. Pete said that he was going to buy the first round to celebrate the fact that his daughter Laura had just achieved a first class honours degree in marine biology - congratulations and thanks Pete. Pete did also mention that wife and oldest daughter had also got firsts so I guess the first rounds are on Pete for the next few weeks!

I cannot remember the topics of conversation in the pub although at various times Kate was in hysterics and I was not sure if she was laughing or crying. Hope your ribs get better soon, Kate.

Brett and Sarah have very kindly offered to host a BBQ from their house next week so we will be running from Cookham Dean. Brett will send out an email with details soon.

See you all next week and I will not be the drunk one next week.

Amanda

Kate's House, Flackwell Heath - 25th June 2008

Run Report by Pete

An Indian summer?

A very lucky 13 of us (Kate – our hostess, Rodders, Amanda, Jules, John, Jerome, Spider, Brett, Sarah, Heather, Duds and Doug and myself) gathered at Kate’s (address withheld to avoid the washing-up) for the annual curry run!!

Heather, looking tanned and relaxed, was bragging about how good Radiohead were and forgot to taker the first turning onto the path after 250 metres! She was not seen again (don’t mention female navigators). The beautiful run down to the Crooked Billet was only spoilt by having to stop and wait whist Jules has a p… If he isn’t getting excited about his bike frame then the flora and fauna of South Buckinghamshire seems to set him off. Either that or his mum keeps letting him out without sending him to the loo.

Straight past the CB we went and headed up into Bloom Wood where the “big loopers” left the “little loopers” (and Jerome, who went straight back to Go). We LL’s had a perfect view of the Thames valley on a fantastic evening as we ran down towards Little Marlow cemetery, where one or two of should have stopped! The run straight back up that hill to Flackwell Heath was not motivational and it was only as we hit the main road that I realised that I was a, alone and b, not near Kate’s!

Arriving back at Catherine’s Tandoori Emporium, we were served the most delightful supper. Presso, David and Selwyn who had not attended due to the fact that said restaurant did not serve Brakespeare’s on tap missed a royal feast. Malai Wali Murghi, Lamb Rogan Josh, Saag Aloo, and Baghari Phul Gobi were all perfectly cooked and complemented by basmati rice, fresh naan bread and multiple pickles. It was so good that Jerome and John went back three (3) times (allegedly). Brilliant Kate, many thanks.

The only surprising thing was there was not more Phul Gobi on the menu after the appalling state of the England Cricket team that evening.

Next week’s run if from the Fox at Ibstone. 7pm.

The Golden Ball & George & Dragon, West Wycombe - 18th June 2008

Run Report by Chris


Aah… Sorry! I know I said I would do it!
And now it’s Tuesday and all Hell is going to break loose because I haven’t. However I have come up with the answer!!!!

"A Form letter run report" Brilliant!

Here is the first draft: Please delete as appropriate sections in red!
We all met up in the car park at the (Venue: enter pub name). Although the weather was a bit We had to wait for (Chris/Kate/Chris/Amanda/Chris/Chris) as they were late again. Another half an hour or so was also wasted whilst (Jules/Jules/Jules/Jules) faffed around with (sat navs/Watch/Batteries/Maps/Bike).
The run started with a (steep run up hill/ very steep run up hill) whilst Fred complained about Jerome’s (smoking/weight gain/slobbyness-probably don’t need to delete any). At the top Presso, Selwyn and David got a bit nervous that the pub was now a good 4oo yds away and headed off on a short loop, They were joined by (Doug/Richard) because (they had a bad knee/had a bad day at the office/ had a good day at the office/ they’re worth it!)
The rest of us followed the lane for another ¾ mile. As ever the conversation was the same:
(pick 2 from the following)
Steve Sutton recalled his present injury list.
Kate told us all how much she is now running
Steve T what a big killing he made on his house sale
John what’s wrong with Gordon Brown
Chris wittered on about something which only he understood and found funny
Amanda how she had gone in the office for two meeting this week and is worried about executive burn out
Michael Herfurt said nothing
Susie how lovely everyone looked and how she thought they’d lost a bit of weight
Fred explained how the roots of the Deadnettle and sitting under quartz cristals were very good for PMT.
Dud’s apologised about the video chip he had emailed with the girl, the dog a bottle of coke and a packet of vimtos.
At one point (John/Jules/Chris/Steve) had a big argument over the route and we back tracked a mile or two.
On return David had changed completely into (his casual wear/gardening cloths/pulling gear) as he had a hot date. Selwyn and Presso had drunk (1/2/3) pints on the kitty.
Talk among the girls focused mainly around how their men are still so (hot/fat/flatulent) and how they were really looking forward to a good (night/row/divorce).
We all disappeared into the night with Jerome and Selwyn left to tidy up the (glasses/nibbles/kitty)

Prince Albert, Frieth - 11th June 2008 - Selwyn's 'Diamond Geezer' evening

Run Report by Doug

Yes, our very own Spellbound reaches his diamond year and, accordingly, the Albert is our venue for this weeks run.

Whilst sure I may be missing someone (and with due apologies) I recall Kate, Amanda, Jools, Jerome, David, Brett, Michael, Presso, Stevie T, John, Rodders, Selwyn and myself as the running group. We were later joined, at various intervals, but with only one resounding gaffe, by Fred, Spider, Duds and Aude, Carters, Ollie and Jackie.

Based on subsequently mailed feedback, this would appear to have been one of the ‘Group’s’ most enjoyable evenings. The recipe for such pleasures is clear: 45 minute pleasant run, nothing too strenuous, followed by more beers than usual and a lift, stagger, cycle home. Let this be a lesson to those who would dare to juggle with the proven formula; the very basis on which our ‘spiritual leader’ instigated these jaunts all those years ago.

As ever, I really have little clue as to our route for the evening, but we went up a little and along a short while before one of the earliest fattie/fittie splits I can remember. We fatties then undertook a long downhill into Skirmett (yes, a landmark I recognised) before an equally long uphill, apparently “towards the convent”, flattening out for another while, then back down to our starting point. As we headed ‘homeward’, Jerome broke into the relevant Simon and Garfunkel number. A gift of great wonder, Jerome’s voice. For those of you who have not had the pleasure, he has agreed to run through his repertoire of S and G songs at Kate’s curry evening. Look out, in particular, for his remix of ‘Keep the Customer Satisfied’….

As we ran, David kindly shared his US Open bets and pointed out the futility of my own. As I suspected at the time, his rather more in-depth research would appear far more likely to bear fruit than the ‘hunches’ of Jerome and myself. ‘Twas always thus.

Fitties arrived back at much the same time and, given the outstanding pace we maintained in our group, really can’t have gone much further.

Selwyn very kindly bought the first round to celebrate the previous days milestone. I remember being amazed when Selwyn reached his fortieth (and slightly more amazed to be at my first ‘friend’s 40th party’ at the age of 27!), but, at 60, he continues to belie the years, continues to pound the footpaths, fields and lanes of South Bucks and continues to put away the Stellas with great aplomb. An inspiration in every way. Many happy returns Spellbound.

Brett did the honours of thanking Selwyn and presented him with a ‘go faster’ slinky top and a most unexpected card, which Fred had signed by then….

I made the mistake of getting the second round in. There must surely be some form of basic aptitude test in existence for bar staff/landlords etc. “One drink at a time……£2.90, £2.90, £2.90 (in fairness, when I ordered 6 bags of crisps, he did group them together as three lots of £1, rather than 6 x 50p) and, whilst £51 seemed a little on the steep side at the time, I would have paid double to be relieved of the responsibility – this chap will not be working in Dublin/Cork for some while yet…

Conversation slowly deteriorated to that old favourite of ‘porn names’ and though I have always been quite proud of my own ‘Dusty Wishart’, I certainly bow to Ollie’s alliterate ‘Shandy Smith’ (?). Duds lifted ill-fitting carvers, Jerome lifted tables with his lithe manoeuvres and our ‘spiritual leader’ watched over his flock regally, Stella in hand, at peace with the world and in love with everyone…

Next week’s run will be from the Golden Ball at West Wycombe. 7pm start.

Run Report Authors

The Dog & Badger, Medmenham - 4th June 2008

Run Report by Presso

This weeks run report is submitted by Lord Lucan, or at least it could have been, since he was as present as the author.
Apologies for lateness but at least I was there for the business end of the run ie a drink or two.
As all will know, the run from The Dog and Badger (actually now an Italian restaurant) starts with an uncomfortable uphill mile, enough to see off most, one of the reasons I was late, but not enough to deter a large turn out of the following: Brett, Doug, David, Duds, Fred, Steve (thanks again), Spider, Pete, Selwyn, Amanda, Jules, Susie, Kate, and Selwyn. Unfortunately, (not), I was a tad late and missed the start, therefore having to jog down the flat bit to Hambleden Mill and back, on my onio, and get a crafty one in before everyone else returned. Fortunately I was able to glean the salient details from others as they returned.
Unlike as is normal that the fitties split from the fatties, it would appear that there were several breaks in the run, with splits at the start of every hill after the first, aforementioned, climb. Let this be a lesson to all route planners that hills are controversial (nay, they are the devils work, put there to exhaust the God fearing...). Put none in the route and you are a GOD. Watch your followers deplete by each hill you insert.
I am reliably informed that, surprising as it may sound, some wild-life was spotted on this run, namely, a brace of rabbits and a deer.....!! Gosh.... not sure that has happened before but since I wasn't there I can only assume that these were amazing rabbits and that the deer was not an old dear, (actually, I was interested enough to qualify that point). Seriously though, I suspect the oily bread is the only thing that keeps this venue on the list.
So, as for the chat in the pub......Funnily enough I wasn't there for that either as I stayed out in the garden (where I could smoke if I wanted..not that I did very much... I think I may have had two) but I would have to say that I started out at the girls end of the table....SHOCK......HORROR.....GASP..... and I did thrash about like a proverbial........(fish out of water for those who didn't get that one) but my auld mucker, Rodders, then turned up having run there from Radnage. Good effort by anyones standards.
We had a very pleasant chat all round until the soft southerners had to disappear inside ( at about 9.00pm when the temperature dropped below 20 degrees) at which point, those tough enough, analysed, defined, and dispensed with depression. (Probably a topic brought on by the soft southerners....or was it Gordon the Moron...?)
Anyway, I'm now stressing as to whether I managed the prescribed number of words for a run report or whether I've bored the pants off everyone who actually ran, or what, really.... anyway..on to my journey home.
I went inside the pub (after those polite enough to stay outside with me had had enough and left swiftly from the car park) to find those, there, were also legging it as quickly as their weary legs would take them. Obviously, they all had Blueberries, and they had all been sent messages that I had not, that it was time for bed.......... During my drive home, I saw, two barn owls, three monkjack deer, six rabbits (two squashed, one in my rear view mirror) the 10 o' clock news, (only in a Mercedes) and two empty packets of Silk Cut... just to remind me to buy some more.
Next weeks run is from The Prince Albert in Freith, which will no doubt piss Selwyn off loads, as he will have no excuse to be late home (or is that just me.).
Presso

The Flowerpot, Aston, 28th May 2008

Run Report by David

….and so it somehow came to pass that 12 foolhardy souls gathered at The Flower Pot in cool, wet and generally unpleasant conditions. It is alleged that I was the last to arrive (hence my scribing now), but it was a close-run thing because, as I pulled into the Car Park at 6.55, I was carved up by three mud-spattered ninja-cyclists who, after much unsavoury scraping and hosing down, revealed themselves to be Rodders, Jules and an old friend of Jules called Simon.
Anyway, in the 10 minutes that it took for the aforementioned bikes to be dismantled and stowed, Rodders ate his supper, Duds deposited the contents of his sinuses over various parking bays (one of which unfortunately contained Selwyn’s bike) and the rest of us stood getting colder and wetter. We eventually set off in two groups. The main pack (comprising Amanda, Duds, Jules, Kate, Pete, Rodders, Simon, Spider and Susie set off on their 5.1 mile (plus a bonus loop for the fitties) hill-fest with Selwyn, under orders from his doc, riding behind. Meanwhile, market-gardener extraordinaire Presso and I trundled off down a relatively gradient-free road towards Henley. After last week’s sartorial statements (although in Brett’s case I’m not sure quite what he was trying to say), this week’s attire was decidedly subdued. The "highlight" was Selwyn’s shorts, which he plainly inherited from Eric Morecambe.
Apparently at some stage Selwyn separated from the peloton and went to find, I think he said, Crocker’s End whilst Pete, concerned that the main group was still running away from the pub after 25 minutes, decided to turn back. Presso and I, with a disciplined regime of running for 10 minutes and then walking for 2, eventually arrived in Henley before heading for home along the towpath. At some stage in the middle of nowhere we bumped into a bloke called Dom (a mate of Presso and Baz, apparently), an encounter which provided a couple of minutes welcome respite and chat.
Pete was first back to the pub with the rest of us arriving in various states of saturated dishevelment over the next 25 minutes. The beer was reasonable, the snacks were plentiful and for once the service at The Flower Pot was half-decent (and the very pleasant barmaid was rather more than half decent). Having been obliged to leave first, I am not the best person to comment on the sparkling conversation and repartee, so I’ll let others provide those details.
Kate very kindly offered to organise next week’s run around the grounds of Cliveden, but since it would require us all to wear Burnham Joggers’ vests, it is actually going to be from The Dog and Badger at Medmenham!
David

Jules & Amandas' 21st May 2008

Run Report by Selwyn


Steve T is threatening to publish league tables of how many run reports we have each done, so watch out everyone. Apparently my record is not good, so hence my (somewhat reluctant) acceptance of the invitation to write this week’s report. Yes it’s late, but at least it should be a little more descriptive than Rodders’ recent effort. Jules has suggested that we should all attempt 100 words minimum, by the way.

Amanda & Jules very kindly invited us to run from their place at the earlier than usual start of 7.45 pm in order that we could return for drinks & eats while settling down to watch the Champions League Final.

Runners had been invited to wear colours showing their allegiance to the finalists. To a certain extent this was complied with, but for some (notably Brett), this resulted in some very strange attire.

Brett wore a very fetching blue cropped top, exposing his midriff in a very unseemly manner. As far as we could see he did not have the diamond stud in his navel – just the normal blue fluff.

Doug wore an attractive little number in blue and yellow polyester and confessed that as a result he had taken the precautionary measure of Vaselining his nipples.

Steve T and myself wore red, David (I think) wore yellow & black (obviously a Wolves supporter) and the remainder (Duds, Kate, Jerome, Susie & Chris) wore various shades of grey, presumably to demonstrate their ambivalence to, or probably more likely total disinterest in either team.

A beautiful evening for a run, the route was the normal one from Amanda & Jules, ie down a steep incline to Bennett End at the start, up a long drawn out gradual climb to the west, through Crowell Wood at the top and back down a track to return to Bennett End. David & I opted to walk up that steep incline home and of course the extra loop fitties had caught us up by the time we reached the field at the top.

Amanda was there to greet us on our return, perfectly timed for the start of the match. Spider joined us, together with various young offspring already in attendance.

At half time, Amanda treated us to a magnificent (and healthy) spread of lasagne & salad. Various attendees made their exits at various times and the rest, as they say, is history.

Many thanks to Amanda & Jules for their generous hospitality.

Venue for the next run (tomorrow) is to be the Flower Pot PH at Aston. To get there by car, turn north off the A4130 Maidenhead to Henley road, or you can get to it across the Thames (by bike or on foot) from Mill End on the A4155 Marlow to Henley road. I will maybe devise a different route to the one we have done previously, if you like.

Five Horseshoes, Maidensgrove - 14th May 2008

Run Report by Jerome

The Five Horsehoes at Maidensgrove on a beautiful summer’s evening was the venue for this week’s run and a fine setting indeed.
Attending were Jules, Chris, Amanda, Susie, Spider, Duds, Steve, Selwyn, David, Kate, Presso, myself and a new runner named Pete Robinson who obviously has been sailing around the world and forgot to stop the first time round. I thought he looked reasonably fit but someone else (can’t remember who) thought a few pounds had found their way on to his midriff. The highlight of the attire was the Roddicks skin tight tops. No prizes for guessing who looked better in theirs.
Fortunately we set off down the steepest hill on the running circuit, so steep that if there was a fresh dump of snow on it the avalanche risk would be 5 on the avalancheometer.
The first two miles was very up and down to the extent that at the first opportunity David, Presso Pete and Selwyn found the alternative route home. The rest of us continued to run into the distance with one person particularly wondering whether he had made a mistake.
However despite some nervous (I’m not sure where we are) looks from Jules the map reader we ran through some lovely woods with fast conditions before coming across a pretty pond with the sun shining just behind – this made it all worthwhile…..NOT!
Shortly after this Kate who had not been running with her usual smoothness, indeed she looked like she had a weight on her shoulders, had to stop. It turned out that the weight wasn’t in her shoulders but elsewhere and it needed to be offloaded.
Obviously this wasn’t clear to the runners until the time elapsed made it clear that this wasn’t the usual stop. Indeed as we looked back a couple of cows started to get a little fruity and we wondered whether they had seen something. Somehow these cows turned out to be Rhodesian Ridgebacks or so Presso and Rodders were discussing afterwards. Somehow I missed the point of this bit and would ask that this is clarified by return.
We finished with the steepest hill on the running circuit and it was disappointing to see that a chairlift hadn’t been installed in anticipation of the snow. For those who ran up it respect and for those who walked respect too.
The pub was hospitable and quiet – yet another sign of the deepening economic crisis in the UK. Steve & Jules started discussing Nintendo Wii’s and at that point a few of us started discussing the commercial opportunities of X rated Wii’s that you can somehow gain sexual satisfaction from. If Jules and Steve think this has potential then please call me.
David disappeared after a drink to dinner somewhere – is there something going on?
At this point and as I moved on to another pint of Krone my memory starts to fade.
That’s pretty much it other than to say thankyou to all who sponsored fred for her walk this weekend and that next week we are running from Jules and Amanda’s house starting at 6.45 in order to watch the Champion League Final. Someone said that we had to wear Blue or Red for the run but frankly the final is a farce because the team that should be there (Arsenal if you don’t know) got knocked out due to a bent referee paid off by the two finalists.
I assume that the hosts would like confirmation of attendees as soon as possible in order to prepare for the onslaught of us Glasgow Rangers fans.
Until next week………………………….Jerome
PS: Sorry Kate

Stag & Huntsman, Hambleden 7th May 2008

Run Report by Steve

On a beautifully sunny evening a the group of us met in the car park of the Stag and Huntsman in Hambleden. Those present were Brett, John, Jerome, Doug, Presso, Chris, Kate, Jules, Amanda, David, Selwyn, (a very slim) Spider and I.

This was a new run created by Selwyn, who – let’s face it - probably has the best sense of direction of any of us and so it was no surprise it all went off without a hitch.

The first part of the run consisted of a game of chicken, running the gauntlet of 200 metres of nettles as we traversed uphill along a narrow footpath, past Kenricks.

After the severe climb, (which was welcomed warmly by all), we continued to the top of the ridge across open fields. By then the wind had picked up a bit and made running conditions just about perfect.

At one point Jules did actually mis-judge the wind slightly and I got a bit of a face full, but he assures me it was an accident. Oh yes, and Amanda had a bit of a nearly-fall (again) but recovered well.

The highlight of the trip was the promised Teletubby House, complete with a grass roof. Apparently, it has an interior floor area of 1000 square metres - lots of room for Po to play with La-la’s Tinky-Winky or whatever.

A little further on Presso, Brett and David discretely avoided the extra loop by hanging back a bit then scarpering when no-one was looking. The rest of us carried on, finishing in around an hour. On the Garmin that Santa brought me for Christmas I made it 5.14 miles.

The beer garden proved a most welcome end to the evening, complete with having their outside bar open – always think that’s a nice touch. The group separated into the main table and the “grumpy old men” table (Kate’s words, not mine). For a local boy I thought that Jerome headed off sooner than expected and the depleted numbers consolidated onto the main table.

Interestingly enough, we all unanimously agreed on the venue for the run after next, but not on the one next week. The run after next (21st) is the Champions League final so we will be making our traditional footy-based excursion to Jules and Amanda’s house. As it is a (Mighty) Man U vs. Chelski final all runners are encouraged to wear either red or blue kit on the run depending on peoples team allegiances or wardrobe contents. Appropriate hats, scarves, klaxons, trumpets, drums etc. are also welcome.

After much cogitation, I am opting for next weeks run (14th) to be from the Five Horseshoes in Maidensgrove. A bit of a trek to get there - but a lovely run.

Cheese.

Steve.

The Jolly Farmer, Cookham Dean - 30th April 2008

Run Report by Brett

I cant believe that I actually enjoyed the outing last night, given that
it was more than a little reminiscent of the worst of school cross
country runs. Running for almost an hour in sodden conditions at the
back of the pack with Captain of rugby Jerome 'German' Bartlett stomping
through puddles and splashing water and mud over all.
No school uniform last night but lots of clingy lycra and luminous togs.
I made a reappearance as the 1970's German goalkeeper Sepp Maier, JB
came straight from his cone placing duty on the M40 and Presso having
run five miles and supped three pints of 'Braks' was straight off to the
Little Milton floodlit bobsleighing championships....... Without his
helmet. Now that's what I call a Triathlete.
Rodders showed his sensitive side by hanging around the back markers and
chatting in his esay way as Doug heaped praise on the continental
refering of the previous nights Man U/Barca encounter. Selwyn who
everyone knows is Keith Hacketts right hand man had his blackbook in
hand taking copious and quite soggy notes. Mrs Riv. came out of
retirement despite the rain)and gave her mended ankle a good work out.
The state of her running shoes this morning means that last nights
adventure is going to cost me a new pair of diamante gym shoes.
Steve 'blogger' Taylor was threatening to pull the blog site, I think
through lack of contribution from other runners,(but I might have got
that wrong). I feel it has been a great success and wouldn't want to see
it go. Fred suggested that perhaps we could add weekly photos and
thankfully is prepared to bring along her box brownie next week.
The Jolly Farmer at Cookham Dean was quiet when we departed on the run
and heaving when we returned, so we went downhill to the more basic
Uncle Toms Cabin. Jules cleverly used the term 'earthy' in describing
the pub, as we dragged clumps of mud across the already filthy floor.
Did anyone have a thick head this morning?. David 'if I was born to
drink lager rather than ale my surname would be Heineken' Abbott,
announced he suffers from a headache when he drinks Brakspears. This is
strange 'cos Presso was telling me that his permanent migraine subsides
as soon as he starts drinking.
It didn't take long to move onto this years pet subject -the content of
Duds sent items. I must say that I find them reassuringly offensive and
was intrigued to note that Amanda can get the up to date football scores
and Duds latest offerings in split screen stylee on that funny techno
thing she had last night.
Lastly and to regognise those who I didn't overhear or chat to, I would
like to thank Richard for going drinking with me on Sunday and Kate for
giving me a lift home and for nominating her daughter to sit for us.
Meanwhile at the end of the evening Susie sat firmly on Chris's lap, I
assume on account of the inadequate seating or was it just to prevent
him from undertaking that final quick loop around the car pub
park......have I forgotten anyone?
See you next week at The Stag & Huntsman.

Hughenden - 23rd April 2008 - Run 4

Run Report by Kate

It was in the lovely evening sunshine we set off with ‘excitement’ up hill from the Hughenden car park, unfortunately ‘excitement’ abandoned us half way up the hill (she had obviously had enough) and we all arrive breathing heavily and sweating at the top! (Well some of us!) Numbers this week were good, ‘virgin’ runners for the 2008 season included Presso, Spider and Richard, welcome back gentlemen, and they were joined by Brett, Jerome, Jules, John, Duds, David, Selwyn, Amanda, Susie (no Chris), Doug and myself.
Once the hill had been negotiated and we had regrouped, we set off into the woods, a certain amount of ‘catching up’ was taking place amongst the back runners. Brett mentioned his gout, the reason for his absence the last couple of weeks, to which Susie sympathized and said her father got that too! (Is there a comparison?) She then went on the ask David about his sheltered housing!
Lots of up and downs, some in woods some not, the back runners continued with their ‘male bonding session’ at one point splitting from the main group entirely only to have us find them later and gleefully overtake them! 40 mins and we were back into the car park, good pace, but quite a short one.(Enjoy boys, it will not always be that short!)
Once watered we retired to the Harrow, why is that pub always empty? Could it be the smiling face behind the bar? Usual high spirits and banter ensued, topics of conversation included Freddy and Oliver winning the Rugby tournament in Belgium, well done boys and a special congratulations to Chris who coaches the team! Susie,
Amanda and I set about trying the remember as many terms for gay people as possible, apparently, according to Brett, ‘bum bandit’ is very 80’s, (How does he know?) ‘pillow hugger’ is actually ‘pillow biter’ and I have at last learnt the meaning of the phrase ‘uphill gardening’. We were all very impressed with Doug, he bravely sat between Susie and Amanda and engaged them in conversation, please note that from now on each male runner will be expected to do this on a rotational basis, husbands are excluded, as they can talk to you at home! (Rotational does not mean every week, John!)
No chips this week, just numerous packets of crisp, peanuts, twiglets, mini cheddars and pork scratching, I can’t help thinking that despite my comments last week chips might have been healthier? No spoofing for the report this week, thank god!
Next week, the Jolly Farmer at Cookham Dean, 7pm. If I remember last year we finished by running through the bottom of the pub garden, perfect run!

Chequers, Fingest - 16th April 2008 - Run 3

Run Report by Jules

For the third run of the season we all set out from The Chequers at 6:45 sharp. The main group included David, Selwyn, Michael, Fred (and Lulu the Lab), Susi, Amanda, Kate, John, Steve, Chris and Myself (spoof looser). Heather also set off with us - but on a brisk walk!
Chris had planned a reasonably short route as the weather was cold and the general consensus is for shorter runs as we all get our fitness levels up. This involved passing through the centre of Turville and then past the Frog in Skirmett before climbing into Adams Wood (which was traversed at a tangent!). Here we split as the main group headed back downhill directly to the Pub and Chris, Jules, Kate and I took a slightly longer route back (about 5 minutes extra). For the majority the run was about 45 minutes and proved very enjoyable!
Refreshments included a couple of bowls of chips - against Kate’s better judgement as she announced that ordering Chips was the thin edge of the wedge as we would soon be ordering meals and, before long, she could see us giving up on the running and becoming a Wednesday Supper Club!! – NOT IN THIS DECADE KATE!! Conversation included the state of the housing market and "pond life" in Dewsbury.
Having decided for the previous couple of weeks that the Run Report would go to the last person to arrive in the Car Park the rules were unceremoniously amended when it emerged that Fred had not joined us in the Pub – so we would "Spoof" for it. The results of that game will not have escaped your notice!!

Next week (tomorrow) we are running from the Church Car Park at Hughenden manor – 7:00 start should be possible if it is not overcast.

The Peacock, Bolter End - 9th April 2007

Run Report by Chris

Very Sorry about the lateness of the report.
If you can’t be bothered to read it we meet at "The Chequers!" at Fingist to start running at 6.45.

Last week we ran from The Peacock and ran, not that many came and we had chips!

The Royal Oak, Bovingdon Green 2nd April 2008

Run Report By Duds

There was a sizeable turn-out for the first run of the 2008 Wednesday running season from the Royal Oak in Bovingdon Green. Steve was late and so ran on his own but the rest of us (Chris-la, Susie-la, Jules-la, Amanda-la, Fred-la, John-la, Selwyn-la, David-la, Doug-la, Rob-la and Stella-laaaaaaaa, Michael-la, Brett-la and I-la) left the car park at high speed to set out on a fun-filled stroll through the Bucks countryside. Having been reliably informed in the car on the way to the pub that the residents of Bucks have the greatest longevity in the UK made me feel just that little bit more sprightly......

As usual there was a fair amount of chat on the way round (not just from me) but apart from that there really was very little to get excited about (apart, maybe, from Doug exposing himself to a hedge and Rodders having nearly been mounted by a galloping horse after Stella had whipped it into a frenzy). The usual three groups of supremely fit/fast, very fit/fast and pretty fit/fast held each others hands for most of the circuit and we all arrived back after around 50 minutes in good health and looking forward to a drink and a packet of Porkies. Jerome's clean-shaven appearance in a suit also lifted our spirits.

Once we were in the pub I can only assume/hope that the minimal offering of crisps and the aforementioned Porkies with each round was due to the usual inflated pricing at the Royal Oak rather than any of the round-buyers thinking that we were all a little bit overweight after a winter of relative inactivity.

It was good to see a lot of familiar faces on the run and hopefully our number will be improved in future weeks with the re-appearance of Kate-la, Ricky-la, Heather-la, Spider-la and anyone else I have momentarily forgotten to mention.
We will be running from The Peacock at Bolter End (or is it Wheeler End common) next Wednesday 9th April at 6:45 pm. See you all then.

Ciao,
Duds-la.

E&OE (this is for Susie !!).

The Start of the 2008 Season

Ladies and Gentlemen

As the clocks go forward at the weekend. its that time of the year when we say goodbye to this....

...and hello to this

May I suggest the first run of the season from The Royal Oak at Bovingdon Green on Wednesday 2nd April. Start time 6:45pm.

Cheers.

Steve.